The world can put pressure on single individuals to be in romantic relationships. That can influence us for the worse, causing us to make hasty or unwise decisions. Succumbing to this pressure can result in frustration, making us feel like we’re working hard but making no progress. But when we decide to rest in Jesus’ finished works in this area, amazing things can happen.
Resting in what he did for us more than two thousand years ago isn’t something we do naturally. We feel the world pushing us toward self-effort, and we must make an active decision to rest. Rest is not inactivity, but rather maintaining our peace of mind as we move forward. We find this peace when we trust God to direct us in all of our relationships. “Lord, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps” (Jeremiah 10:23, NIV).
We can be full of ideas about who we want to meet and socialize with. However, if those ideas are our own and not God’s, we can make a wrong decision and end up in a bad relationship. People aren’t always what they appear to be at first, but when we let the Holy Spirit lead the way, we’ll always make the right decision.
We live in a culture that has an “I want it now” mindset, and this can cost us dearly when looking for a potential spouse. Fear and impatience can cause us to depend on our own efforts and make a mistake. The fear of never finding anyone can cloud our judgment. Having confidence that God has set aside a match for us puts our search in a whole new perspective. “So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised” (Hebrews 10:35, 36, NIV).
Most people think this promise pertains just to heaven, but God is speaking about our lives right now, too. He loves us and knows what we want most, and his will is for us to trust that he wants to bless us with loving, fulfilling relationships. When we feel ourselves being influenced by the world’s mindsets and pushed toward fear and anxiety, we must actively resist. Finding our way back to our place of rest and peace of mind in Christ can be hard work! “Therefore, since the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us be careful that none of you be found to have fallen short of it” (Hebrews 4:1, NIV).
Human error can always happen when we trust our own wisdom to find a special person for us. If we’re spinning our wheels with no results, asking God to intervene will turn things around. In the Old Testament, God promised his people good things that they didn’t earn through their own merits (Deuteronomy 6:10-12; Joshua 24:13), and he kept his promise. When we acknowledge who is ultimately responsible for any godly relationships we enjoy, those promises will work for us as well